Humble beginnings

Psalms 22:9, But thou art he that took me out of the womb: thou didst make me hope when I was upon my mother’s breasts. 

Psalms 22:1, I was cast upon thee from the womb: thou art my God from my mother’s belly. 

I am who I am today because of God’s grace! God has planned and ordained my life for his glory!

I came into this world through my dear mother’s fifth pregnancy but the fourth living child. As I got older I learnt that my mother gave birth to a “still-born” son before me. I have two sisters above me and the firstborn of the family was a brother. Then, my parents went on to produce another sister, two more brothers and the youngest child a sister. Growing up with such a big family and living in one of the third world countries (The Philippines) at one of the remote villages, life was hard. My father was a farmer and did his best to provide for his family. My mother did some work “mat weaving” at home to compliment my father’s income. Most of us sisters learnt our mother’s trade to help her fulfil the mat orders she had. We all worked on the coconut farm that my father was the caretaker of. We grew our own vegetables, fruits, corn and raised chickens and pigs.

It was a tough life growing up! We did not have much, most of our clothes were hand-me-downs, our home was a one bedroom village hut, our parents & younger siblings slept in the bedroom (no beds but sleeping on mats on wooden or bamboo floor), the older siblings slept in the lounge floor, like sardines at times when relatives and friends stayed overnight. Despite all that, we were happy, accepted the truth that this is life for us in the village. Generally, when our designated home chores and school homework were done we played hide and go seek, played in the dirt, marbles, rubber bands games or hopscotch to pass the time. For a bit of extra excitement, we used to scare each other with different tricks we have learnt, climbed on trees or slid down from a smaller hilltop with just a piece of hard cardboard or part of the coconut palm leaves wide enough to sit on. Roller coasters, what is that??

One of the things that I admired from my parents for the rest of my life was that they encouraged us all to do well at school, that we may have a better future. My mother used to say to us, “your education, nobody can take it away from you”. Even now, I could still hear her voice saying it, unfortunately though she had passed away last January 2021 at 85 years of age. My father died suddenly in 1983, when we were mourning for the eldest brother’s passing three days prior. It was one of the most tragic moments in my family’s life. I can’t remember much of what happened on that fateful day. I guessed my brain just couldn’t cope and blocked out a lot of things. But, if only I knew more about God then, the creator of the universe, read and studied the Holy Bible, then my understanding and reactions would have been different.

The truth is, the family did not own a Bible, nor have access to one, our knowledge of God’s existence was only through one hour each week at school Catechism teaching, but it did not do much for me personally. I did memorise the Lord’s Prayer which I often prayed whenever I was scared during my childhood, as well as the Hail Mary’s and the Apostles Creed. Family prayer time was not observed except when someone passed away, Christmas time and Easter. Church services were only available in town or if we have a radio we could hear the Catholic mass on it. However, there was a season during my elementary school years that I was involved in the Baptist Church distance Bible study correspondence course. I learnt about the creation stories, the first man Adam and first woman Eve, their fall from grace and departure from the garden of Eden, I learnt about the stories of Noah, Moses, Job, Jesus’ birth, death and resurrection and the story of John the Baptist. To me then, they were just stories, nothing to do with me I thought. I did not understand the importance of all those stories. I was learning them to get awards if I passed the test and not about my eternal salvation. But God’s grace was present then without my total awareness of it.

I started primary school when I was just over six years old by chance. I was visiting the grade one class in our village school one day and I loved it so much that I kept going back. The kind teacher of the class allowed me to continue and I finished grade one as one of the top students that year. It gave me confidence and encouragement to do well for the following years and I finished elementary school with the highest honours. It made my parents very proud and to see the joy on their faces was amazing. It gave them hope that I would continue to do well into my high school years, all through college and then have a good job to support the family as expected in our culture. But, the truth is, life is unpredictable! It does not matter whether a person believes in God or not, what is expected and the choices the child do along the way affects many people. When the parents expectations are not met, it causes disappointments, pain, separation, dysfunctions, etc with everyone in the family. I have learnt now that our expectations and hopes must come from God and not from other human beings. He gave us the gift of life not our parents and we must do our best to live life for his glory and honour.

My first year in high school went well as expected but during my second year in high school, things did not go well and I had to terminate my studies abruptly, left home to live & support my eldest sister who got married to a man she met during her work travels. Her new husband worked location was at one of the bigger cities on the other side of Mindanao island. Unfortunately, the marriage did not work out so my sister and I went back home about two years after. My parents sent me back to high school to resume second year as well as my eldest sister. By this time my sister above me was doing her last year of high school. She then went on to college with a scholarship to do Bachelor of Commerce. All hopes was on her that she will be the one to rescue the family from poverty instead of having our hopes on God. Unfortunately, all hopes were lost when she disappeared for a few years after she graduated. My parents were struggling to pay our tuition fees so I had to leave home again when I was fourteen years old and lived with one of my Aunts who graciously offered to pay for my third year high school tuition fees in lieu of my services which includes house chores as well as taking care of her three young children.

My fourth year in high school took another turn in my life. My mother found another family in a nearby city who needed my services and in return they would provide for all my needs for my last year in high school. I cared for this family’s five young children during the day as well as house chores then I went to school at night. Fortunately, the school was located just in front of their three storey apartment and all I had to do was cross the road and into the classroom. Yes, three storey house is a lot to clean and maintained, too many clothes to wash and ironed everyday, cooking and cleaning the dishes etc. They family were decent enough but the older children were very naughty. How I managed to do everything only God knows.

The truth is, God helped me reached my goals, he sustained me and I finished with honours once again. I can look back into that year now and see with a grateful heart how God provided all my needs with his divine protection and favour over me and I learnt patience, determination and courage to endure this very challenging time in balancing work and studies. My parents came to attend my graduation evening and were very proud to see one of their daughters received awards from my hard work of studying. So what’s next after high school? Did I passed the entrance examination to go into college? How am I going to pay for my college fees and which college or University would it be? Watch this space 🙂